emotional release – Beyond the Breath Online Magazine

Who the heck is this?

23/11/2024 No Comments

Hey! Sophie here. I’m an almost 30 year old red-headed Yorkshire lass just starting my journey with Breathing Space to become the best breathwork facilitator Yorkshire ever saw.

This belief in myself is not something I’m hugely familiar with – it has grown in the last few years and particularly since May this year when I experienced by first Conscious Connected Breathwork class whilst on a ‘wellness’ retreat in Greece (I use the term lightly as the trip was run by regular party goers who were aiming for chill vibes. They did alright to be fair).

But who is she REALLY?
Ya gal has been through some shit. The shit started when my ex died in 2020. This was bruuuutal I can tell you. Him dying changed my perspective on literally everything in my life. I was pissed at couples walking down the street holding hands. I was reluctant to pay off my credit card because what was the point? I might die tomorrow shrugs nonchalantly (Obvs I did pay my credit card because ya gal has anxieties that override everything else)!

BUT

Whilst navigating the classic stages of grief, I realised I was actually quite liking the person I was becoming. Pre-trauma Sophie was proper square. She was a rule follower to a T and her life was lacking fun because of this. I had been a people pleaser and would prioritise everyone else’s emotional well-being waheeeey before my own. Shortly into this grief journey, I started to become more selfish but in the best way. Being selfish isn’t a bad thing. Being selfish means introducing boundaries and honouring your own emotions and wellbeing before anyone else’s. I have feelings too dammit, and they’re absolutely valid.

Since 2020 I have also lost both my Dad and my Cousin. Again, this was horrific to go through. Sadly, feeling quite experienced in the realm of grief by this point, I was able to draw on the journey I’d already navigated and seemed to handle these things fairly well (in the grand scheme of things). Don’t get me wrong, I felt incredibly guilty for feeling OK again much sooner!

My dry sense of humour has always been a masking tool I’ve drawn upon. My ability to joke about ~dark~ stuff is one of my favourite qualities. However, in the last couple of years my spiritual side has ventured into sight and I am exploring all kinds of weird and wonderful woo woo worlds (top marks for alliteration here). Because of this, the dark humour no longer served me QUITE as well. I was being forced to confront and FEEL things.

I saw a post today about the term ‘lifequake’. “A significant and unexpected shift in the trajectory of your life that initially feels devastating but has the beneficial outcome of catalyzing personal growth, transformation and rebirth.” Not sure who to credit for this but all hail this being! Thank you to Martin, Jaygo and Dad for being my lifequakes (although, given the choice, would’ve preferred you not to have been)!

Why breathwork?
Having worked in the NHS for 7 years, I got myself into a bit of a mental pickle. I know it isn’t something I want to do forever but what the Dickens could I do instead?! Cue the aforementioned wholesome trip to Greece in May 2024. We had a list of add-ons to choose from beforehand with breathwork being one of them. I didn’t give it much thought, thinking it sounded a bit lame or me. Obviously I got FOMO from everyone talking about the AMAZING experiences they’d had.

Thankfully, more sessions were put on so I signed up. Boooooyyyy am I grateful for that! It was a conscious connected breathwork session. It was hard. It was uncomfortable. It was weird. I was feeling a bit on edge anyway so it wasn’t much of a surprise when I started crying. I wasn’t quite ready for the full on emotional release that followed, though. We breathed with open mouths into the belly, chest, head, on cycle for about 20 minutes. The facilitator touched my abdomen and it was like she was literally pushing tears out of my face. Incredible. Suddenly, I realised what I had to do. I NEEDED to become a breathwork facilitator. So here I am – one seminar into the Breathing Space Breathwork Facilitator Programme, going for gold.

What’s the plan?
So what’s next? Well, I’m going to put my absolute all into the course. I’m going to learn everything I can and experience everything I can to make me the absolute best facilitator I can be. I hope to help people through their lifequakes so that they too might go for gold.

Sophie x

Sophie | @sanguine.soph

To find out more about Sophie, take a look at her profile in Practitioners Corner

On trusting the breath and letting go of outcomes

18/11/2024 No Comments

I don’t know about you but I have sometimes lost my equilibrium as I stressed over issues I cannot control in my life, or imagined negative future events. On those days I need conscious connected breathwork more than ever. It’s also on those days that I resist this work more than ever.

Before discovering breathwork, I would sit in my familiar discomfort and gradually lose more and more stability. The consequences of not dealing with my emotions would make me edgy and unsatisfied with life, and then I would wonder ‘how did I get here’?

Now I know better. I find a comfortable place to sit or lie down and I start breathing. No pauses at the top, no pauses at the bottom. The first few minutes are really uncomfortable. As I move through the layers of my mental defenses, I feel as if I am ripping through myself. My mind does not want to give up control and I want to quit. I want my familiar dark. But I push and I embrace the uncertainty of letting go of my mind. It feels risky, but I am brave. Eventually, I surrender to my body and there is no more fragmentation. I become an ocean of waves rising and collapsing into myself.

My mind and body are one, sweet consciousness experiencing itself. What the breath brings I never know until it happens. Sometimes I desire a release but it doesn’t come. Sometimes I set an intention to bring clarity or resolution to a problem, but the breath delivers clarity on something else, unrelated to what I was fussing about. When I finish, the session I am strangely whole and relieved even though my wish for a specific outcome didn’t come to be. The darkness has dissolved. The confusion is gone.

I have come to understand that sometimes in order to resolve one thing, you first have to grasp another truth, which in turn resolves the one you were concerned with. Truth unveils in layers and in a kind of order sometimes. It’s not linear and it’s not black or white. I have learned to let go of outcomes and just focus and trust the breath to illuminate what needs to be revealed. The breath knows better. There is safety in this trust.

The breath is the light, not just on your truth, but on truth itself.

Jasmina

To find out more about Jasmina take a look at her profile in Practitioners Corner

Connection is an inside job

06/10/2024 No Comments

Being in Relationship with your Breath.

One the greatest privileges I have as a Breathing Space Teacher is witnessing the transformation that happens when trainees develop their own relationship with their breath. There is a deep intimacy that expands and spills out into everyday life as the relationship evolves, but it always begins within. It truly is an inside job.

I’m wondering, did you notice how reading this first paragraph made you feel, or what thoughts came up for you, or what happened within your body?

For some of you this deep intimacy with yourself might feel scary, for some it might feel exciting, for some of you it might feel neutral – or maybe natural might be a better description. Whatever you felt, the invitation is not to judge but just to notice. I remember many years ago when I first heard of Shiatsu, a form of body work, the practitioner told me that it can induce emotional responses. I was petrified! It took me months to pluck up the courage to book an appointment, my emotions were so tied up and knotted, I did not want to open that box.

It makes me smile now to remember how our life force often intervenes and you receive what you need. Although I had peaked inside the box many times over the intervening years, the first time I did breathwork I sobbed for the whole session. The box was well and truly open.

To be fair, I had been working in a very cerebral/coaching/counselling kind of way with family grief and loss, so I did need an outlet, indeed as I began my own relationship with the breath, I experienced a whole array of emotions and body talk that has transformed my inner world into a kaleidoscope of colours.

Now, breath is a way of life for me. At a recent family gathering, when anxiety around being with so many people was rising, I paused, and I breathed in a conscious, rhythmic manner for just 1 minute and my whole body, mind and soul relaxed as I found my centre point again. In just 1 minute! It was a living example of how integral my relationship with the breath is in my life, and how impactful it is on my life experience.

As with all relationships, there is ebb and flow, and there is an ongoing commitment required to staying in relationship with the breath. We are just about to start a new group Breathwork Facilitator Training, which I’ll co-teach alongside the Hybrid version of the Breathing Space facilitator training with in-person workshops in York … I digress … As a commitment to myself, and to the trainees who trust me with their journey, and most importantly to the breath, I’m doing the training programme again myself.

One of the first requirements is to write a blog – Why Breathwork, what brought you here? I’m adapting the question slightly to why breathwork, what keeps you here?

The answer is simple – Connection is an inside job.

About the Author – Sharyn-With-A-Why

To find out more about Sharyn, take a look at her profile in Practitioners Corner