There is a huge difference between the point of infatuation that you feel when you first meet a potential partner in life or even just for a season vs the gentle falling in love process that happens over time as you get to know that person, begin to share yourself with that person and then to see how you weave and create together.
It’s a great analogy for my relationship with breath work thus far. My first experience was explosive. Very much like that lightening bolt of infatuation or attraction, the magnetic pull that leads you in ever deeper.
But like most relationships, at some point the deepening becomes more important than the emotional reaction to the chemical synapses.

“I encourage you, in fact it’s a requirement of graduating the course, to have a daily breath work practice” says my breath work teacher. I roll my eyes heavenward. The infatuation period is over.
I have always struggled with a daily practice. Prayer or bible reading when I was religious. Daily visualisation and manifestation techniques as I began to explore spirituality. Daily exercise .. ever! Daily posting on social media as I started my business. Getting up early and finishing your day before everyone else has started. Daily juicing – I could go on, the list of these daily must do’s is exhausting!
I give a big sigh! Another ‘daily’ to fail at. Consequently, I make a very half-hearted attempt. I recorded my singing bowls to utilise in 3.6.5 breath inspired by a fellow facilitator. I bribe myself, no coffee until you’ve taken conscious breath outside for at least 5 minutes etc etc. Nothing works.

Eventually, in a fit of pique akin to a two-year-old tantrum I screech “I will NOT” (inside my head obviously!!) or in adult speak, I release the ‘trying’ and let it go into the alchemy of natural change.
What I noticed as I did this, was quite miraculous.

Nothing happened immediately of course, but as I forgot my childlike tantrum and forgot about my resistance, over a period of time, I found myself turning to and integrating breath into my everyday life. When I took a walk, I began counting my breath and so I introduced what I call Square breathing, but others may recognise it as Box Breath. As I prepared to read or prepared to write I found myself naturally starting with a few rounds of conscious connected nose breathing. When I was struggling with learning a concept or making a connection, I turned to conscious connected open mouth breathing. When I needed to explore my inner senses, I sparked my creativity by breathing into my 3 inner brains – instinct, intuition, and intelligence – employing felt sense to guide me. When I felt scattered, I took a few deep breaths to gather myself back in. When I wanted to connect with people, I encouraged breathing together.
Without actually ‘doing’ or ‘trying’ anything, simply by being natural, I was incorporating so much more than a contrived daily practice into my life. Conscious breathing was becoming an integral part of who I am.
As I reflect on this, I return to my analogy of falling in love. No longer a frenzy of infatuation, conscious breathing is becoming the love of my life. A deep connection that I miss when it’s not there, something I turn to in times of need, something I turn to in times of celebration, something I can’t help but speak about whenever I get the opportunity, and anyone will listen!

This blog was first written as part of my facilitator training with Breathing Space, the school where I now teach. This next paragraph is a recent addition.

Like a relationship with a person, I began to take breath for granted, and forgot to appreciate and to engage with the breath quite as regularly. This coincided with a very stressful time in my life. Where the support of the breath would have been so welcomed and was certainly needed! Unlike some of our human relationships, the breath is nonjudgemental and is there for me whenever I return, offering the same sage wisdom, and sharing the experiences that I need in the moment. Every time.

I’m learning the radical act of self-love (to let go of perfectionism) and to be kind to myself, reminding myself of my mastery in this field and letting myself return gently to that place of constant connection. So, if as you read my earlier words you thought “That’s ok for you, I’m not there yet!” Trust me, nor am I, nor will I ever be. I’m learning though, that I don’t need to be ‘there’ I just need to turn up. Wherever I am. Right here. Right now. And as long as I show up, the breath will meet me there.

PS – thankfully most of my humans have supported me during my stressful times too. So, thank you one and all from my heart to yours. You each know who you are. xx

Sharyn-With-A-Why

To find out more about Sharyn, take a look at her profile in Practitioners Corner